My Current State of Mind

So, this might be my first deep thinking blog...

I usually do not like to write down my feelings.  I am not a strong writer.  It is very difficult for me to express myself fully through writing, but I will try :-)

So, my current state of mind is...

Surrounding myself with peace.  Calming my mind.  Experiencing any negativity, then LETTING IT GO!!  I guess the Rethinking Education Conference really got me started thinking about creating peace.  I have always imagined that we can never live completely in peace.  I still believe this, but I am trying to change my ideas about what to do with any negativity that comes my way.  I am trying to simply notice it, then move on (usually away from it).  This is easy to do with negative media, etc.  It becomes harder with friends and family.  It is the hardest to do with Stephen & the kids, mainly because I want to FIX everything.

I am trying to be ok with walking away from negativity & taking time to breath through it.  For example, we have had a very stressful day in our house today.  Maya has been whining all day, I miss Stephen, Stephen is tired, it's hot....  Somehow through it all I am very peaceful.  I did what I could to help Maya, I asked for 3 minutes of focused talking with Stephen & I am trying not to feel guilty about putting some of my friendships on hold for right now.

I am focusing on what I really want & how to achieve it.  I am focusing on living in the present and being ok with the past and the future.  I am listening to my heart.  I get so caught up in maintaining an image and caring about what others think of me.  I am now realizing that I am authentic to myself and that is the best I can do.

You may not like me or like what I have said, but I guarantee I have been authentic with you.   My style may not fit your style & THAT IS OKAY!  We will connect another time (or not).

I took some great advice from Dayna Martin...you have the choice to be around who & what you want.  It is not our job to fix anyone or to make them see our way.  

It is our job to live peacefully with ourselves!

I want this!

(How was that?)